The King of All Cosmos has a fascination with all things on Earth, and a fascination with blowing said things up into stars. Rather akin to a young boy using a magnifying glass to gleefully burn ants, the King uses his son to roll things up so that they can be turned into stars (or stardust, if the Prince does not do well enough). The katamari, the death ball of sticky alien goo, was originally a game thought up by the King. The rather eccentric King also has a tendency to wipe out stars, islands and more stars accidently and have his son remake them. If his son happened to fail in trying to follow his father’s orders, he would be scolded, shot with laser eyes, strung up and punched, and used as target for ball in pool. Yes, the King of All Cosmos is psychotic as best. He’s also on Twitter.


The Prince of the Cosmos, under orders from his father, controls katamari in order to suck up the world in order to explode his collection into a star. If one isn’t crushed to death under the weight of bigger things being added to the katamari, drowned when the katamari rolls through the ocean, or suffocated from katamari glue, they are exploded. How can you prevent this from happening to you? Simple. If you see the Prince, merrily rolling his way over your surprisingly cluttered floor, you crush him. Do not be merciful. Do not be taken in by his cute round head, bright green clothes or catchy theme song. His only goal is to kill you, your loved ones, and the world if he can get that large within his father’s time limit. He is a 10 cm tall murderer. You will be a hero.

note: crushing the prince won’t take that much effort to do. just get the job over with quick so the world can continue on and not be exploded. that is, if you don’t mind his rainbow coloured blood on your hands. if you do, don’t use your hands.



If the culprit rolling the katamari is not the Prince, do not shrug it off as okay. This could be one of the Prince’s 58 cousins. Yes, the Queen of the universe either has many siblings or a few busy siblings. In any case, there are 58 other little monsters trying to make stars. Crush them all.

note: the cousins all have the same face as the prince and are the same size as the prince. they are pretty much the prince but with terrible hats. it’s hard not to recognize a cousin when you see one.
they also have terrible names and are as follows: foomin, fujio, kuro, marcy, jungle, nik, peso, odeko, shikao, honey, marny, velvet, nickel, ace, opeo, colombo, ichigo, lalala, havana, johnson, june, miso, dipp, twinkle, nutsuo, kinoko, l'amour, lucha, odeon, shy, huey, drooby, beyond, macho, daisy, miki, can-can, slip, signolo, hans, norn, nai-nai, kenta, mu, ban-ban, paula, pokkle, ryu, kunihiro, kyun, mag, harvest, pu, sherman, princess, dangle and drive.
crush them good, the earth will thank you for your heroism.